Hari Om.
Let us begin the thirteenth sarga of the sundara kAnDam by offering our prostrations at the lotus feet of SrIrAma and our sathguru.
Not leaving even an inch to chance, hanumAn thoroughly scanned through the private chambers of rAvaNa. He saw all his women, and the demon himself, all of them in deep sleep indicating the indulgence they had in a while ago in food, drinks and other amorous activities. He noticed that the captive women of rAvaNa were enamoured by him. While he searched for sItA through them single mindedly, the moral doubt arose in him about the propriety of sneaking into the private chambers and peeping into it. This moral doubt had the potential to inflict guilt on him and derail his mission. But he brilliantly reasoned. He went to the root of thought and action and reasoned that mind was responsible for thoughts and the senses follow with action. If the mind was pure, no matter what the temptation was, senses wouldn’t perform immoral acts. In his case, his mind is pure and he felt no temptation upon seeing all those women. Reconciling thus, he moved ahead. Still, not finding sItA anywhere, he felt very depressed. Onwards..
In a trice, like the lightning, hanumAn jumped off from the tower of the mansion of rAvaNa and went around it searching for jAnakI. Not finding her anywhere, he said to himself –
“I have combed through the lanka in search of sItA, thoroughly looked through ponds, lakes, streams, rivers, gardens, mountains, forts and everywhere on the land, but have not found the hereabouts of the graceful beloved of rAma. I have not been able to locate sItA in the mansion of rAvaNa as told by sampAti, the vulture king. Alas, could it be that unable to resist any more, sItA yielded to the cruel rAvaNa? Or could it be that, as rAvaNa flew away with her, afraid of the arrows of rAma, she slipped and fell down? Or, perhaps, while being carried away in the aerial route, in terrible stress, struggling to wriggle out of rAvaNa’s clutches and beholding the vast sea, her heart might have stopped and she might have fallen into it. Alas, away from her loved ones, she might perhaps have been devoured by the wicked rAvaNa. Or she might have been miserable thinking of the lovely lotus like eyes of the moon-like charming rAma and lost her life brooding over rAma, lashmaNa and ayOdhyA. But, how can the daughter of janaka and the consort of rAma yield to rAvaNa?
No matter, where she is alive or dead or not found, it is not right to carry this bad news to back to rAma. Reporting it is not right, nor is not reporting it, alas, this is indeed a hard decision for me to make.
निवेद्यमाने दोषस्स्याद्दोषस्स्यादनिवेदने।।5.13.18।।
कथं नु खलु कर्तव्यं विषमं प्रतिभाति मे।
How would I have achieved my objective if I go back to kishkindhA from here without seeing sItA? My leap across the ocean, entering the lanka and seeing the demons will all go in vain. What would either sugrIva or the sons of daSaratha or the vAnara mates who came with me say to me? If I go and tell kAkutstha (rAma) that I didn’t find sItA, he won’t be able to take this devastating news about her and won’t survive. Unable to bear the end of rAma, the wise and loyal lakshmaNa will perish as well. Learning about the two brothers, other two brothers Bharata and Satrughna will also follow suit and then without doubt, havinglost their sons, the mothers, kausalyA, sumitrA and kaikEyI won’t survive. The grateful and truthful sugrIva won’t be able to bear the loss of rAma and will perish. Due to this, both his wife rumA and the much-troubled tAra won’t survive nor will the prince angada. Unable to stomach the end of their kind, compassionate and the caring king, the vAnaras will end their lives by jumping off the cliffs or poisoning themselves, or immolate themselves or hurt themselves with weapons and die. Alas, my return will cause quite a devastation through the total destruction of the ikshvAkus and the vAnaras. Therefore, I will not go back to kishkindhA from here and I will not see sugrIva without finding sItA.
घोरमारोदनं मन्ये गते मयि भविष्यति।।5.13.37।।
इक्ष्वाकुकुलनाशश्च नाशश्चैव वनौकसाम्।
मय्यगच्छति चेहस्थे धर्मात्मानौ महारथौ।।5.13.39।।
आशया तौ धरिष्येते वानराश्च मनस्विनः।
If I don’t go back, the righteous and valorous rAma and lakshmaNa and the vAnaras might live in hope. Therefore, it is better if I don’t return and just live on the seashore subsisting on whatever fruits and roots that I can get to my hand or mouth living the life of a recluse. Let not the naras and vAnaras die due to my failure. I will probably live on here in utter self-restraint. Or I may light a pyre and enter the raging flames. Or perhaps I should just sit on fast unto death and let the crows and other scavenger eat me apart. Or, I may take a route approved by the sages which is to just walk into the water and end life. The golden run of my glory which started on a high has crashed by not being able to find sItA!
सुजातमूला सुभगा कीर्तिमाला यशस्विनी।।5.13.44।।
प्रभग्ना चिररात्रीयं मम सीतामपश्यतः।
My going back without seeing sItA will bring ruin and ravage to angada and other mates. So I might just stay here holding on to my life living a reclusive life. Ending my life would be inglorious and bring disrepute. If I manage to be alive, I might be able to experience good. Therefore I shall hold on to life as it is only he who lives might see good”.
विनाशे बहवो दोषा जीवन् भद्राणि पश्यति।।5.13.47।।
तस्मात्प्राणान् धरिष्यामि ध्रुवो जीवितसङ्गमः।
एवं बहुविधं दुःखं मनसा धरायन्मुहुः।।5.13.48।।
नाध्यगच्छत्तदा पारं शोकस्य कपिकुञ्चरः।
Thus bearing the enormous sadness in his mind, hanumAn was unable to pick himself up from the disappointment of not finding sItA until now. And then he thought again –
“Or it might be fitting and fulfilling for me to just vanquish the ten-headed demon rAvaNa who abducted sItA. Or like dragging the animal, I shall carry off this rAvaNa and submit him to rAma”.
रावणं वा वधिष्यामि दशग्रीवं महाबलम्।।5.13.49।।
काममस्तु हृता सीता प्रत्याचीर्णं भविष्यति।
अथवैनं समुत्क्षिप्य उपर्युपरि सागरम्।।5.13.50।।
रामायोपहरिष्यामि पशुं पशुपतेरिव।
Thus, not finding sItA and riveting anxiety, hanumAn started thinking further course of action-
“Till such time I find the illustrious consort of rAma, I shall repeatedly search for her in lanka. Simply relying on the words of sampAti, if I had brought rAma here, not finding sItA he would have ravaged all of us.
Oh, here I see the aSOka vana full of majestic trees. I have not looked for sItA here. Let me go there. Conquering the demons, I shall enable rAma to attain sItA like a sage in penance attains emancipation. I will go to search for her in the aSOka vana offering my salutations to the vasus, rudras, Adityas, aSwins and the maruts to enhance the misery of the demons”.
For a moment, he battled the battered senses and got up with a fresh, then deliberated and got up for action and said –
नमोऽस्तु रामाय सलक्ष्मणाय देव्यै च तस्यै जनकात्मजायै।
नमोऽस्तु रुद्रेंद्रयमानिलेभ्यो नमोऽस्तु चन्द्रार्कमरुद्गणेभ्यः।।5.13.59।।
“Salutations to rAma, salutations to lakshmaNa and dEvI sItA. Salutations to rudra, indra, yama, vAyu. Salutations to Chandra, sUrya and the maruts”.
Having bowed to them all as well as sugrIva, taking a good look at all the eight directions, he moved towards the aSOka grove and even before being there, began thinking about his course of action there –
“Protected by many guards, and well maintained, the grove must be a sacred place. The wind is also blowing gently and I must shrink to a small size for the sake of rAma and to be inconspicuous to rAvaNa.
The gods and the host of Rshis shall bless me with success, as also the self-manifested brahma, agni, vAyu, the thunder wielding indra, the noose wielding varuNa, sOma (moon), sUrya, aSwins, maruts, Sarva. May all the visible and invisible beings bless me with success as also their lord (Siva).
तदुन्नसं पाण्डुरदन्तमव्रणं शुचिस्मितं पद्मपलाशलोचनम्।
द्रक्ष्ये तदार्यावदनं कदान्वहं प्रसन्नताराधिपतुल्यदर्शनम्।।5.13.68।।
Ah, when can I behold the very pleasant moon like face of the noble lady with a high nose, faultless white teeth and eyes beautiful like lotus. Abducted by that wicked, mean, cruel fellow with a dreadful look, how would that frail and tormented noble woman come into my line of sight today.
Here we conclude the thirteenth sarga of the sundara kAnDam of SrImath vAlmiKi rAmAyaNam and humbly offer it at the lotus feet of SrIrAma. Hari: Om!
jAi SrIrAma.
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Next: 5.14. hanumAn in the zone!
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rAmabhaktisAmrAjyam 